Those who have lived
in hostels, or lived away from family know what I mean by the "Room
mates" people. The ones whom you lived
with, cooked with, shared your
bed with, spent almost the whole day in their company. These are the people a
different face of them you saw inside and outside of the four walls, whose habits who picked up unknowingly. These people are the ones who see the "within
the four walls" face of yours that only your family has so far seen.
There are different
kinds of such "Roomie" people.
These room mates might
be ones whom you knew already but may not have been really close, but someone whom you
could call an acquaintance or sometimes even a friend. But having to spend all
your time, literally all 24 hours of a day in their presence, seeing the other
side of them, getting to know their
tolerance levels when things go wrong, getting to know their attitude towards
life , their fears , and generally their adaptability standards has been a
shocking experience. It shocks to see a
totally different person from what you see outside of this home, sometimes this
is for the better , sometimes for the worse. If it tends to the worse and gets
to the extreme like the one I am going to talk about next, then it can get a
little awkward given that you have already shared a friendship with them. But ,
count yourself twice lucky if it tends to be for the better and you guys make
great roomies.
These room mates might
just be complete strangers to you, whom you just met a couple of hours back.
These stranger turned roomies, might get into the category of the people who
can get on to your nerves. You can't stand their tantrums, you blow a fuse at
every move of theirs, you get annoyed at them sharing your space, you can't
tolerate them not sharing the house work with you, you can’t accept the way
they manage their finance, you can't put up with their so-called-funny stories,
you can't digest their cleanliness standards, you can’t forgive their
irresponsibility or their indifference to you as a roomie, in all you just
can’t live with them. It is not a very happy thing to be living with these
people. You get it out all with cribbing to a far away friend or to a family
member of your not-so-fun times with them.
Some of these
stranger people, when made roomies , strike an excellent chord of friendship
with you. Though not always greatly
similar in thinking or in likes and dislikes, you start liking them a great
deal, respecting their differences, discovering your own inner self in the
relationship. You start adapting their
likes, dislikes and preferences , do the crazy things they do adding up to your
own craziness and rub some of yours onto them as well. You learn a lesson or
two from them , probably even pick up a bad habit from them, knowingly or
unknowingly. When with them, you never ever feel , they are tending to invade
into your private space or time, just because they know what their limits are. You don't mind compromising on your likes and dislikes once in a while, you step out of your comfort zones sometimes to accommodate their preference, but all with happiness and a sense of share and care. The secret of this relationship is not because you are so much like each other,
or have the same preferences, it is because you complement and enjoy
similarities with each other to just the allowed extent and you respect the dissimilarities
with each other with grace. They become more than just buddies, getting to know each other a great deal, knowing each other secrets, fears, threshold levels , you respect and love each other and you have sense of belonging with them.
Whether they took us by surprise , or we loved them or we hated them or we got annoyed by them, one thing is for certain, we got to
know them a great deal . They help you see and realize the faces of people within and outside of
"4- wall home" premises. Such
relationships are much needed in everyone's life, you ought to live with
somebody that is not your family, to appreciate or understand the aspect of
relationships in life.
In my world, I have
been blessed with some really great roomies and also the
not-getting-along-too-well ones. This post is dedicated to one such roomie when
I lived aboard who is a great friend till today.
